The Common Thread

If there is one thing I have learned from all of this, it is that I am not alone. My situation may be unique... but the outcome of infertility is not. The more I open my mouth and let others in, the more I realize just how many are struggling with infertility as well. I have found hope and peace, strength and courage from those with whom I share this one common thread. Having a network of friends that I can lean on for understanding or a listening ear has meant so much to me over the past few months. Often times it is with people with whom I have never even met or barely even know. That thread is what links each one of us together, and it is often times, what holds each one of us together through such a trail.

My sidebar contains a list of friends with whom have shared this common tread with me, and the type of infertility they suffer from. I know that this list is incomplete... I am not aware of the names of some of the conditions these women suffer from and I also know that this list will continue to grow as I create that common thread with new friends. If you are on my list please send me the proper abbreviations that link to your name (if you wish to be removed from the list completely, please let me know). For a list of abbreviations, please click here or visit the link entitled "Terms and Abbreviations" on my sidebar - if you do not see the applicable abbreviation for you, make one up! If you know of those who would like to be a part of my infertile network, please send them a link to my blog, I would love to get to know them.

I have also created a logo (picture above) or blog button that you can add to your blog with a link to your story. If you have any ideas on how I could expound on this network or networking system, please let me know.

There really is truth to the phrase, "strength in numbers". I hope that we can all lift and strengthen each other through our struggles and our one common thread.

Pieces

My surgery to remove my right uterine horn (which had no communication with my actual uterus and was suspected to have endometrosis) finally arrived last Tuesday. Everything went well and as planned and I am recovering. This surgery has left me with feelings and emotions that I don't typically allow myself to have. It is as if the surgery just sucked all of the positivity and optimism right out of me. The reality that my body will never allow me to conceive a child naturally has set in more than ever. The reality of how I was born, and what has been taken and removed, and how it simply cannot be fixed or replaced is clear.

I returned to work this Wednesday and to the love and concern of the people with whom I work with. The other designer I work with asked for a better explanation than I had previously given her of just what exactly they did. The best way I knew to explain it was by drawing a picture. I pulled out my sticky notes and drew what a normal uterus looks like and gave a brief explanation of the parts (uterus, fallopian tubes, and ovaries). Then, right below that image, I drew what my anatomy looked like when I was born. That image was followed, by how my anatomy looks now (after two surgeries). When I glanced down at my own drawing, I realized just how pitiful it looked. And not just because of my artistic inabilities, but rather that there really wasn't much there. It was all just a bunch of PIECES, none of which do what they are suppose to do.

I am left with two fabulous ovaries. The right has a fallopian tube to communicate with, but no uterus communication. The left side contains my unicornuate uterus (half the normal uterus), but does not have a fallopian tube to make communication between my uterus and left ovary(my left fallopian tube was removed as a child). Simply put... a bunch of useless PIECES, a scar covered tummy, and no baby to hold and call my own.

Follow-up

As a follow-up to my last post entitled, "Avoiding the Why Me's" I wanted to share the following. In this post I shared a few of my feelings and thoughts on the possibility that we chose our trails in the pre earth life. My sweet friend shared a story on her blog in relation to what I had said. It is such a touching story, and it brought tears to my eyes. Her family has been blessed through adoption and is currently trying to adopt again. Please visit the following link to read the story which she shared...

Click Here